I agree. Hindi dapat mag impose ang mga tao na “dapat” kasal and may anak ang babae to be “complete”. Whatever circumstances led them to their current station in life, nobody should make them feel less of a woman. Mean din yung ibang mga babae, na sila pa mismo ang nagda down sa kapwa babae. Let her (and others like her) choose her life’s path, let her live it to however she wishes. Kung meron kayong asawa at anak, be happy for yourselves and don’t measure other people’s worth based on your own values.
1:49 Totoo baks! Lalo na mga "tita/tito-levels" na para bang may checklist ang buhay ng babae. Kailangan kasal na ba by this year, baby # 1 on this year, blah blah blah. Ugh!
do not invalidate the struggles of others just because someone/you are having it worse. siguro hindi mo po naramdaman mga pinagdadaanan na sinasabi nya, and i hope you won't...
People sa pinas have been swimming in toxic cultural rules and expectations sa babae. Alex is simply flipping the middle finger on these so-called requirements.
Kasi hindi sa diploma nasusukat ang katalinuhan. Parang ikaw di ko sure kung may diploma ka o wla, pero it seems like you are not well-read or well-informed.
tbf hindi lang sa atin ganyan, buong mundo ata ganyan din pero in different degrees ang curiousity at pressure. May mga lalake din na tinatanong kung kelan magkakajowa/pasakal/anak.
talagang sabay pa tayo nag-PMS ghorl!!! basta simula napanood ko si madam Candy pangilinan sa interview nya, i take her advice na "do not compare, do not conform, do not compete and you will be satisfied and content." ganerrrn
Ito kasing mga lola, lolo natin ang pasimuno 😂 dahil noong unang panahon padamihan sila ng anak. Ang batayan nila sa lalake ay ilang anak ang mabubuo at sa babae naman ay kung ilan ang kayang ipanganak.
I’m married but can’t have kids pero i feel this. NOON. I stopped caring because ang nasa isip ko. May jowa/asawa at anak ka nga. Pero marami ka pa rin namang hanash sa buhay di ba? Atleast ako i have one less problem. Lol.
Hay, sa atin kasi ang daming pakialamera. Kesyo kapag 30s na mahirap na manganak or matanda ka na (dahil na rin cgro mas mababa ang life expectancy sa atin). Jusko po, yung iba nga nasa 40s or 50s na nag aanak para may pambuhay sa mga anak. Hindi gaya sa atin, wla na ngang pambili ng bigas, mag aanak pa ng marami. 🥴
Uso din kasi sa atin yung mag-aanak para gawing insurance. Yung pag napagtapos na yung anak, aasa na sya na yung magiging breadwinner at magpapaaral sa mga kapatid. Jusko.
137 gurl, I am just stating facts. Nasa Eu nman ako, may asawa ta 2kids at tumutulong sa pamilya. Nakakaloka lang minsan yung kapatid ko, wla na ngang permanent na work, may plano pang magdagdag ng anak. Hay, ewan sa atin. Lol, may issue nga ako. 😂
This is actually kind of messed up, tbh most people aren't good parents. I get na human instict to have hope and to persevere kaya people have kids anyway even if they're not financially and emotionally ready, and to some extent nothing can prepare people for parenthood so everybody ends up figuring it out as they go, but sa totoo lang napakaliit na percentage ng mga tao yung matinong magulang. I feel like overpopulated naman na ang mundo, so there's no need to have kids just for the sake of having them. And no offense, yung mga nagkeclaim na nakumpleto sila nung nagkaroon sila ng anak, or that it's nice to have a child because iba parin yung meron kang maituturing na sayo, kayamanan ang mga anak...from my observation those are the parents who tend to be overbearing, controlling, nirerelive ang buhay nila through their kids...etc. In general, not cut out to raise a whole separate person from themselves cause they treat their children as an extension ng mga sarili nila. Usually, those types of people do a lot of damage to their children, and yung attitude ng mga ganung tao is actually normalized in ph culture.
1:12 Huh? Saang fantasy world ka ba nakatira? Yan ang katotohanan. Ewan kung bulag ka, naive or in denial ka lang. Pwede rin na either nega ka or taong mabilis ma rattle. When people state facts, tingin mo kagad issues. Grow up.
358 may pa fantasy world ka pang nalalaman. Nasa Germany lang ako baks. Hahaha, pwede ka pang magkaanak hanggang 40s kung healthy ka nman, lalo nat may pera ka, pwedeng pwede maski pa sampu. At kahit anong edad pwede kang mag asawa. I am a caregiver din dito at karamihan sa mga German hanggang 80 to 100 ang lifespan. Karamihan din sa kanila hindi nag aanak ng marami kasi mahal at gusto nilang magbakasyon kapag wlang trabaho. Sa atin? Wla na ngang permanent n work, nagawa pang mag anak ng mag anak. 🙄
1:12, on point. Family planning is a massive requirement in the Philippines. It's SO irresponsible. Look ay all the street kids, beggars and such. The number of children should coincide with people's ability to provide for such.
Honestly, this hurts me the most. when people are so insensitive na ipamukha sa iyo na wala kang anak. sa halip na tulungan ka sa acceptance, kasi they don't know gaano kahirap din sa amin tanggapin na wala kaming anak. minsan naiisip mo naging masama ba akong anak. pero sa ibang tao prang pinapramdam na di ka kumpleto. di naman namin yan minsan choice eh, kaya lang we are not blessed para magka baby.
1:16 Very true. Minsan kasi malapit na natin ma accept, pero sadyang may tao lang na guguluhin ang process of acceptance mo. Then you get messed up and start thinking and questioning again. Cycle talaga sya
1:20 Baka ikaw ang ma drama. Tingin mo sa lahat ng nangyayari ‘drama’. Sumagot lang ang tao, nadadramahan ka kagad? Ang OA MO naman GEEZ. Also, setting things straight doesn’t necessarily mean you care. Sometimes you just want people with low IQ and EQ to understand. Parang responsibility mo as a human na turuan ang mga mahihina ang utak. Kahit alam mong di nila magegets, you still try.
Para yan sa mga tita na paulit ulit ang tanong sa family gatherings. Na para bang sobrang laking achievement pag may asawa o anak, e physically and verbally abused naman sila for real at kinunsinti lang ang mga bisyo at pagka babaero ng asawa nila. Lol. Kung ganyan man lang, I'd happily stay single and happy than haggard and stressed.
I feel you Alex. Kelangan ba mother ka or wife ka para macomplete pagkatao mo? Hindi ba pwedeng dahil ibang landas gusto mong tahakin kaya ayaw mo maging wife or maging mother. Cmon people 2021 na, bat napaka old fashioned p rin thinking ng iba dyan. Nasa panahon pa ba tayo ng kastila?
Kasi uso ang pagiging sensitive at woke ngayon, minsan mahirap magsalita in case makaka-offend yun sasabihin mo sa kausap mo. Maski hindi mo intesyon ang mag offend ha.
Agree ako kay alex. Minsan kaasar na talaga yung everytime may conversations with family and friends, ang laging tanong, kailan ka ba mag-aasawa? Mag-asawa ka na kasi! Ang tanda mo na, mag-asawa ka na! Na para bang ang dali-dali lang pumulot ng aasawahin jan sa tabi-tabi. Nakakabuwiset na rin talaga minsan. Nakaka-down pa na feeling mo, ano bang mali sakin? May mali ba sakin?
I feel you, nakakaasar lalo na sa mga reunions, tampulan ka ng tukso kasi single ka p din at walang anak. Pero pag nagkakwentuhan na ng buhay, eh mas miserable pa yung buhay nila kesa sa akin
Ganyan e..una iinsultuhin ka kasi walang anak at asawa, tapos pag inexplain mo ang side mo tatawagin ka pang bitter. E kung tigilan kaya yung pamumuna sa mga babaeng single, at wag makialam sa choice ng mga babae?
May karapatan silang humanash at maging bitter dahil sa mga taong toxic na ipapamukha sa kanila ang kakulangan nila kuno dahil iba ang circumstances nila kumpara sa nakararami.
Ang hindi ko maintindihan, daming taong hanash ng hanash sa buhay ng iba. Samantalang ang dami nilang mas kailangan punahin at ayusin sa sariling buhay nila.
Well, to be fair yung level ng pressure sa mga asian cultures to conform ay mataas talaga. We lean towards collectivism and we reject or push out whoever is not sticking to the norm so hindi surprising na maraming nagvevent dito na they are struggling internally cause ang tingin sa kanila ng mga tao ay hindi sila normal or may mali sa kanila. I would not say they are bitter but they are definitely feeling overwhelmed or frustrated from thinking that they are doing something wrong and who they are is not acceptable.
Oh well, matanda na kasi si Alex kaya parang ganon nga ang makita sa kanya. No love life, no partner and no kids at her age is not expected in pinas kasi.
Hmmm, in pinas even your family will ask the same questions. Wala ka pang asawa, wala ka pang anak, ang tanda mo na, tumaba ka na, may puti na ang buhok mo, etc.
Hmmm, that’s why I don’t intend on going back to pinas. Here, abroad, nobody cares about those things. They only care about who you are as an individual and what you can do.
Wag nyo kc pansinin. If you pay attention it means you are affected! If you confidently beautiful with a heart just ignore be silent and create your own paradise.
THIS. I am one of those women na okay lang hindi makapagasawa at magkaanak. But that doesn't make me feel less of a woman. Alam mo naman sa sarili mo if marriage and motherhood is for you.
Hirap ng buhay mag aasawa pa ba dapat? Dami gastos kaya at pandemya pa heller. I advised my daughters not to get married less hassle less stress less expenses sorry sa mga gusto mag asawa parang luxury na sakin ang marriage pasensya na po nkk trauma ang bills
People love to impose and project their values on other people. Instead of being sensitive and discerning on what not to say, they act rude and ipamukha pa sayo na kulang ang pagkatao mo pag wala kang asawa at anak.
I wholeheartedly agree na di kakulangan sa babae ang di pagkakaroon ng anak or asawa pero kasi napansin ko yung mga ganitong defend nang defend sa ideals kuno nila, sila din yung atat na atat magka-anak at mag-asawa.
I don't think so. Marriage and kids actually scare them dahil alam nilang hindi biro yun. These women are just free-spirited and don't conform easily to traditionalist society.
Hindi naman. Minsan kasi mapupuno ka rin kapag paulit-ulit ng tanong. Lalo na kung wala ka namang naaagrabyado dahil single ka. Di rin naman nila papakainin pamilya mo kung sakaling mag-asawa at mag-anak ka. Pero kada kita sa'yo tatanungin ka kung kailan ka mag-aasawa. :)
Hindi naman. Me and my husband 8 years married before mag decide mag anak kasi super inenjoy namin na kaming dalawa lang muna. And hindi kami atat mag anak
Hindi kaya. 30+ na ko nag asawa. Inenjoy ko ng bonggang bongga ang 20s ko. And i will continue to defend those who choose a different path than mine. Hindi lahat atat. That's a fact.
It's a struggle to have people tell you why you don't have kids yet. And you know, the pressure is real especially if you see women posting happy mother's day gifts on social media kaya I am not as active as I used to be na sa FB. But I would want my own child, because I grew up as a single child to a solo parent after my father died when I was 8. And then my mom died when I was 15 and the struggle of loneliness and being alone is real on this one. Kaya I am really trying na magkaanak kame ng asawa ko because I've suffered loneliness long enough and I want to grow old with my husband, children and apos. S
Nagtry kami for 5 years ng husband ko.. pero wala tlga. Lagi akong umiiyak sa gabi, iniisip ko anong kulang sakin, bakit sa iba ang dali. Ngayon tanggap ko na at ng asawa ko na wala tlga, hndi ako blessed magkachild pero blessed naman ako sa ibang bagay. Pero sa culture natin unfortunately may mali at kulang syo kung hndi ka magkaka-anak.. at magasawa. Sana mabago na yan.
I feel for you. I count my blessings too. Kahit na walang anak, masaya kami ng asawa ko pero etong mga relatives namin ang laging nangungulit. Wala sa plan namin ang mag-anak sa totoo lang is there something wrong with that? Wala, our life- our decision. Periodt
Frankly speaking marriage is a trap. You will be trapped with responsibilities and expectations. If I had to describe marriage in two words: sacrifices and hard work. Life becomes a routine and it’s very expensive to build a family. Of course kids’ love is the best thing in the world. But kids and husband won’t give you the happiness you need. It should come from within you by not forgetting and neglecting who you are, who you want to be. Find your own source of happiness first and you will be a better wife and mom.
Wow 4.29pm! Pak na pak! Sayo na ang ms.universe crown! At dahil sa sinabi mo, di ko muna ipush na magka love life kasi wala pa akong happiness from within hehe
429 tama ka nman. Hehe, but for me, single or married without kids was not for me. Nakakadepress yan. Now, married with kids happy na ako. But sa totoo lang, parang sa kids lang nabawasan ang sadness ko sa buhay. I don't know what is wrong with me but lagi akong malungkot.
Agree! We need to talk about this kasi lagi nalang ginoglorify yung pagiging mommy and wife without much attention sa totoong trade off ng pagaasawa. It's really not for everyone sa truelang.
Ok lang sana kung ang mga pakialanera at tsimosa ang magaalaga sa anak mo. Sa hirap ng buhay now my time p kayo mang bwishit ng ibang tao. Unahin nyo muna ang pamilya nyo bago ang ibang tao noh!
My goal talaga is to be that tita who will dissuade the young ones from getting married. End the cycle ganon! HAHAHA tbh i’m not at that tita age yet but i’m quite open to my nosy titas na i don’t wanna get married coz i don’t wanna be miserable hehehe
Kelan ka ikakasal? Pag kinasal na: kelan kayo mag aanak? Bilisan nyo di na akyo bumabata. Pag nagkaanak: oh kelan nyo susundan? Lumalaki na dapat sundan na. Pag nasundan: o baka uulit ka pa, tama na yan. Kawawa naman asawa mo na nagttrabaho.
Bwiset. Mapa single o may asawa, aminin nyo, may mga tao lang talaga na pakialamera sa buhay natin. Kahit ano gawin mo, sinusukat ka lang talaga. Mga pakshet
Yes! Allow people to choose their own path, hindi yung minemeasure mo kung asan sila sa buhay based on society's expectations. Kung saan sila masaya, respeto.
We had a friend who struggled to conceive. It took 11 years after getting married to finally have a baby and we, her barkada, were there for her journey and struggles. Sobrang happy kami when she told us she's pregnant!
Pero nung naging mommy na siya, she looked at us differently. Parang she thinks she's above us all kasi she's now a mother and kami lahat are lower beings for being single and/or childless. Lahat ng topics niya tuwing hangout is all about motherhood and how she feels complete kasi she has a baby now... Somehow we started to drift apart kasi medyo masakit na sinasabi niya.
Hay. We're just sad that someone like her, who knew the struggle firsthand, became something like that in the end. A woman putting down other women.
Go Alex!
ReplyDeleteMag form kayo ng support group ni Donnalyn Bartolome.
ReplyDeletem sure a lot of women would join that group.
DeleteI am a big supporter of women empowerment. Society should never dictate a woman’s true essence and value.
DeleteSali ako.
DeleteInclude me and 99+ others.
DeleteTama naman sila diba? I would join that group.
Delete12:47 they have a point. Ikaw ano point mo?
Delete239! I will join
DeleteThat would be great. Para matapos na ang toxic ideas about being a woman.
DeleteSama ako and Im sure maraming sasama sa group na yan kasi ang daming nakakaranas nyan
DeleteSali din ako dyan baks!
DeleteSino naman si donnalyn?
DeleteHahaha gj ka diyan alex.
ReplyDeleteVery well said, Alex. Go girl! 🙌🏻
ReplyDeleteI agree. Hindi dapat mag impose ang mga tao na “dapat” kasal and may anak ang babae to be “complete”. Whatever circumstances led them to their current station in life, nobody should make them feel less of a woman. Mean din yung ibang mga babae, na sila pa mismo ang nagda down sa kapwa babae. Let her (and others like her) choose her life’s path, let her live it to however she wishes. Kung meron kayong asawa at anak, be happy for yourselves and don’t measure other people’s worth based on your own values.
Delete1:49 correct ka jan! My gahd.
DeleteAnd these are the same women who prolly post “Queens fix each other’s crown...” stuff on socmed. Pathetic.
Sadly ganyan ganyan ang thinking ng mga matatanda, kamag anak ko dito sa probinsya. Hay
Delete1:49 Totoo baks! Lalo na mga "tita/tito-levels" na para bang may checklist ang buhay ng babae. Kailangan kasal na ba by this year, baby # 1 on this year, blah blah blah. Ugh!
DeleteUhm people don't care. Less of a woman drama mo doesn't matter in these crazy times.
ReplyDeleteYou have one sad f**ked life anon 1252
Deletedo not invalidate the struggles of others just because someone/you are having it worse. siguro hindi mo po naramdaman mga pinagdadaanan na sinasabi nya, and i hope you won't...
Delete12:52 bakit ka pa nag reply?
Deletesad life mo.. relevant yang sinadabi nya.. dami kasing toxic at nega na katulad mo..
Deleteu'll be surprised how it still mattered in these crazy times. m sorry that people around u dont give much eff about you
Delete12:52 never makakarelate ang isang heartless na gaya mo
DeleteHintayin mo yung araw na magkaproblema ko or issue na di mo kaya ma take. Ampalaya mo.
DeleteIt matters.
DeletePeople sa pinas have been swimming in toxic cultural rules and expectations sa babae. Alex is simply flipping the middle finger on these so-called requirements.
12:52 Your comment doesn’t matter either. In crazy times or normal times, the earth doesn’t need people with mentality like yours.
DeleteVery well said, Alex! You go girl
ReplyDeleteI support Alex! I totally get it and thanks for saying this out loud.
DeleteShe's smart even if she did not finish her studies.
ReplyDeleteKasi hindi sa diploma nasusukat ang katalinuhan. Parang ikaw di ko sure kung may diploma ka o wla, pero it seems like you are not well-read or well-informed.
DeleteYou don’t have to finish school to be smart. Dami diyan de masters degree pero waley.
DeleteWow you can’t even compliment without throwing shade. You must be fun at parties.
DeleteAnother stereotype, you need not finish studies to be smart.
Delete8.02am yung presidente nga natin, lawyer pero waley haha!
Delete6:56 nakakatawa na yan?
Deletesa totoo lang, hindi na talaga mawawala sa pinoy ang ganyang pagiisip kaya deadmahin na lang talaga
ReplyDeletetbf hindi lang sa atin ganyan, buong mundo ata ganyan din pero in different degrees ang curiousity at pressure. May mga lalake din na tinatanong kung kelan magkakajowa/pasakal/anak.
DeleteHindi solusyon ang pangdededma. Hindi matatapos yung ganyang thinking. I-acknowledge at itama ang dapat gawin.
Deletetalagang sabay pa tayo nag-PMS ghorl!!! basta simula napanood ko si madam Candy pangilinan sa interview nya, i take her advice na "do not compare, do not conform, do not compete and you will be satisfied and content." ganerrrn
ReplyDeleteThis! I stand with you girl!
DeleteIto kasing mga lola, lolo natin ang pasimuno 😂 dahil noong unang panahon padamihan sila ng anak. Ang batayan nila sa lalake ay ilang anak ang mabubuo at sa babae naman ay kung ilan ang kayang ipanganak.
DeleteMarried and have kids nga but BROKE 😆
ReplyDeleteI’d rather be single and rich. Paaralin ko na lang mga pamangkin ko.
Apir madam! Go go go!
DeleteBasta yan ang happiness mo, gorabels 🙂
DeleteIm married, happy and I have money. Not all single woman have money though.
DeleteAnd not all married woman have money din no 🤨
DeleteI’m married but can’t have kids pero i feel this. NOON. I stopped caring because ang nasa isip ko. May jowa/asawa at anak ka nga. Pero marami ka pa rin namang hanash sa buhay di ba? Atleast ako i have one less problem. Lol.
ReplyDeleteKapag walang project, maingay talaga mga artista
ReplyDeleteThat’s their job. To stay relevant. Friends mo nga sa FB ang daming ingay. So normal lang yan. Lol.
Deleteat least may saysay ang sinasabi. eh ikaw? puro ingay lang.
DeleteMay sense naman ang ingay niya unlike ikaw, nagbabasa ka na nga lang nega ka pa
Delete1.01 Pinapansin mo naman sila
DeleteIkaw nga, di ka artista pero ang ingay mo.
DeleteWith few more brain cells, I’m sure you’ll get her point. Walang kinalaman ang pagiging artista ng isang tao in having opinions about certain things.
Deletekung yung mga ordinaryong tao nga post ng post sa fb or IG para mapansin, artista pa kaya?
DeleteAt yan lang talaga ang nakuha mo sa mga sinabi nya? Wawa ka naman.
DeleteKayo nalang ni Empoy, Alex. Bagay kayo.
ReplyDeleteMas bagay kayo ni Empoy 1:04 go go go na!
DeleteMay asawa na ata si Empoy
DeleteHay, sa atin kasi ang daming pakialamera. Kesyo kapag 30s na mahirap na manganak or matanda ka na (dahil na rin cgro mas mababa ang life expectancy sa atin). Jusko po, yung iba nga nasa 40s or 50s na nag aanak para may pambuhay sa mga anak. Hindi gaya sa atin, wla na ngang pambili ng bigas, mag aanak pa ng marami. 🥴
ReplyDelete1:12 mas marami kang issues, sa true lang. LOL
DeleteUso din kasi sa atin yung mag-aanak para gawing insurance. Yung pag napagtapos na yung anak, aasa na sya na yung magiging breadwinner at magpapaaral sa mga kapatid. Jusko.
Deletefacts lang sinasabi ni 1:12
Delete137 gurl, I am just stating facts. Nasa Eu nman ako, may asawa ta 2kids at tumutulong sa pamilya. Nakakaloka lang minsan yung kapatid ko, wla na ngang permanent na work, may plano pang magdagdag ng anak. Hay, ewan sa atin. Lol, may issue nga ako. 😂
Delete2:01 super agree! Hindi insurance policy ang anak! Unpopular opinion ito lalo na dito sa Pinas with its “utang na loob” culture.
DeleteTinamaan ka ba, 1:37?
DeleteThis is actually kind of messed up, tbh most people aren't good parents. I get na human instict to have hope and to persevere kaya people have kids anyway even if they're not financially and emotionally ready, and to some extent nothing can prepare people for parenthood so everybody ends up figuring it out as they go, but sa totoo lang napakaliit na percentage ng mga tao yung matinong magulang. I feel like overpopulated naman na ang mundo, so there's no need to have kids just for the sake of having them. And no offense, yung mga nagkeclaim na nakumpleto sila nung nagkaroon sila ng anak, or that it's nice to have a child because iba parin yung meron kang maituturing na sayo, kayamanan ang mga anak...from my observation those are the parents who tend to be overbearing, controlling, nirerelive ang buhay nila through their kids...etc. In general, not cut out to raise a whole separate person from themselves cause they treat their children as an extension ng mga sarili nila. Usually, those types of people do a lot of damage to their children, and yung attitude ng mga ganung tao is actually normalized in ph culture.
Delete1:37 Comment section ‘to. Duh! 🙄
Delete1:37, mas ikaw yata at di mo nakita na totoo ang sinasabi ni 1:12. Sa true lang.
DeleteTotoo. Be it relatives, chismosang kapitbahay o kung sino sino na kakilala mo laging ganyan pagiisip pag nalaman na 30s na and single pa. The heck
Deleteagree.ung ibang mga sumasaling bata sa TV contest pra maiahon ang pamilya sa kahirapan ang dahilan...child abuse yon eh. Grabe. Filipino mentality.
Delete1:12 Huh? Saang fantasy world ka ba nakatira? Yan ang katotohanan. Ewan kung bulag ka, naive or in denial ka lang. Pwede rin na either nega ka or taong mabilis ma rattle. When people state facts, tingin mo kagad issues. Grow up.
Delete358 may pa fantasy world ka pang nalalaman. Nasa Germany lang ako baks. Hahaha, pwede ka pang magkaanak hanggang 40s kung healthy ka nman, lalo nat may pera ka, pwedeng pwede maski pa sampu. At kahit anong edad pwede kang mag asawa. I am a caregiver din dito at karamihan sa mga German hanggang 80 to 100 ang lifespan. Karamihan din sa kanila hindi nag aanak ng marami kasi mahal at gusto nilang magbakasyon kapag wlang trabaho. Sa atin? Wla na ngang permanent n work, nagawa pang mag anak ng mag anak. 🙄
Delete7:53 You nailed it
Delete1:12, on point. Family planning is a massive requirement in the Philippines. It's SO irresponsible. Look ay all the street kids, beggars and such. The number of children should coincide with people's ability to provide for such.
DeleteHonestly, this hurts me the most. when people are so insensitive na ipamukha sa iyo na wala kang anak. sa halip na tulungan ka sa acceptance, kasi they don't know gaano kahirap din sa amin tanggapin na wala kaming anak. minsan naiisip mo naging masama ba akong anak. pero sa ibang tao prang pinapramdam na di ka kumpleto. di naman namin yan minsan choice eh, kaya lang we are not blessed para magka baby.
ReplyDelete1:16 Very true. Minsan kasi malapit na natin ma accept, pero sadyang may tao lang na guguluhin ang process of acceptance mo. Then you get messed up and start thinking and questioning again. Cycle talaga sya
DeleteAng daming drama neto. Napaka overbearing. If you dont really care, you wont also care to explain yourself lol
ReplyDeletetulog na po tita.. o ang rayuma mo baka umatake haha
Deletetinamaan ka auntie?
Delete2:35 mas maraming tita and older ang relate sa kanya. Baka younger yan na nag cocomment sa taas like you.
DeleteTrue! It means affected sya
Delete1:20 Baka ikaw ang ma drama. Tingin mo sa lahat ng nangyayari ‘drama’. Sumagot lang ang tao, nadadramahan ka kagad? Ang OA MO naman GEEZ. Also, setting things straight doesn’t necessarily mean you care. Sometimes you just want people with low IQ and EQ to understand. Parang responsibility mo as a human na turuan ang mga mahihina ang utak. Kahit alam mong di nila magegets, you still try.
DeletePara yan sa mga tita na paulit ulit ang tanong sa family gatherings. Na para bang sobrang laking achievement pag may asawa o anak, e physically and verbally abused naman sila for real at kinunsinti lang ang mga bisyo at pagka babaero ng asawa nila. Lol. Kung ganyan man lang, I'd happily stay single and happy than haggard and stressed.
ReplyDeleteWalang jowa kaya mainit ang ulo
ReplyDeleteIsa ka pa eh. Lalaki lang ba poproblemahin ng mga babae??? Mygod stop this way of thinking!
DeleteShe has jowa fyi. Di lang announced. Director ng gma7 jowa nya.
DeleteYou obviously didn’t get her point.
Delete1:34 Ganyan ka siguro noh? Eew, pathetic. Well hindi lahat ng tao kagaya mo, na sa jowa umiikot ang mundo.
DeleteI agree with Alex!
ReplyDeleteI feel you Alex. Kelangan ba mother ka or wife ka para macomplete pagkatao mo? Hindi ba pwedeng dahil ibang landas gusto mong tahakin kaya ayaw mo maging wife or maging mother. Cmon people 2021 na, bat napaka old fashioned p rin thinking ng iba dyan. Nasa panahon pa ba tayo ng kastila?
ReplyDeleteBakit ung tyahin ko baliktad ayaw pag asawahin mga anak nya kahit nasa 40s na cla?
DeleteKasi uso ang pagiging sensitive at woke ngayon, minsan mahirap magsalita in case makaka-offend yun sasabihin mo sa kausap mo. Maski hindi mo intesyon ang mag offend ha.
ReplyDelete2:12, if you don’t know what’s offensive and what’s not then you have a
Deleteproblem. Not the other way around.
So kampi ka sa mga taong ginagawang requirements ang kasal at anak sa pagiging babae?
Delete2:21 MALI KA. Usong uso na ngayon ang pagiging insensitive and feeling know it all. I think dito ka sa category na to
Delete1:18 kakampi ba ang dapat o solusyon? Walang mananalo kung puro husga ang both sides. Try to see it from each other's perspective.
DeleteAgree ako kay alex. Minsan kaasar na talaga yung everytime may conversations with family and friends, ang laging tanong, kailan ka ba mag-aasawa? Mag-asawa ka na kasi! Ang tanda mo na, mag-asawa ka na! Na para bang ang dali-dali lang pumulot ng aasawahin jan sa tabi-tabi. Nakakabuwiset na rin talaga minsan. Nakaka-down pa na feeling mo, ano bang mali sakin? May mali ba sakin?
ReplyDelete:( i feel you
DeleteWell answer it pakialam mo get a life! Sabay laugh oh Di ba.
DeleteI feel you, nakakaasar lalo na sa mga reunions, tampulan ka ng tukso kasi single ka p din at walang anak. Pero pag nagkakwentuhan na ng buhay, eh mas miserable pa yung buhay nila kesa sa akin
DeleteHahaha true. Sagutin mo ng aanhin mo ang asawa kung sa Tulfo lang din ang uwi nyo?
DeleteThankful ako kahit papano sa pandemic kasi walang reunions. Lol.
Delete10:41 That is so true, yung married nga sila with kids pero miserable naman ang buhay at nalosyang sa kunsumisyon.
DeleteGood for you, Alex! I like your guts!
ReplyDeleteEwan ko lang pero yung mga humahanash ng ganito parang mas lumalabas pang bitter sila.
ReplyDeleteNot bitter, they just had enough of people not minding their own business.
DeleteTrue! If she doesn’t really care why the hanash? Ignore na lng nya or deadmahin.
DeleteGanyan e..una iinsultuhin ka kasi walang anak at asawa, tapos pag inexplain mo ang side mo tatawagin ka pang bitter. E kung tigilan kaya yung pamumuna sa mga babaeng single, at wag makialam sa choice ng mga babae?
DeleteHindi naman bitter. Pwede namang napuno na lang. Ang swerte mo naman na hindi mo napagdaanan yung pinagdadaanan nya
Delete2:38 isa ka na dun sa mga daming kuda na kesyo you’re not a real woman if you’re not a wife or mother by a certain age
DeleteHindi naman bitter. Pwede namang napuno na lang. Ang swerte mo naman na hindi mo napagdaanan yung pinagdadaanan nya
DeleteMay karapatan silang humanash at maging bitter dahil sa mga taong toxic na ipapamukha sa kanila ang kakulangan nila kuno dahil iba ang circumstances nila kumpara sa nakararami.
DeleteAng hindi ko maintindihan, daming taong hanash ng hanash sa buhay ng iba. Samantalang ang dami nilang mas kailangan punahin at ayusin sa sariling buhay nila.
2:38 may mali sa utak mo kung pabo mag process ng opinions and beliefs ng tao. Paganahin mo pa ang utak mo to understand.
DeleteWell, to be fair yung level ng pressure sa mga asian cultures to conform ay mataas talaga. We lean towards collectivism and we reject or push out whoever is not sticking to the norm so hindi surprising na maraming nagvevent dito na they are struggling internally cause ang tingin sa kanila ng mga tao ay hindi sila normal or may mali sa kanila. I would not say they are bitter but they are definitely feeling overwhelmed or frustrated from thinking that they are doing something wrong and who they are is not acceptable.
DeleteIkaw sinasabihan ni alex
Delete2:38 bitter dahil ang daming pakialamerang tao sa Pinas. Numpake kung wala pang asawa at anak.mag-aambag ba sila?
DeleteYou think Of that? Bawal mag sabi saloobin sa mga nakukutya about why Not yet married? No jowa, no Baby?. Wow ha!
DeleteOh well, matanda na kasi si Alex kaya parang ganon nga ang makita sa kanya. No love life, no partner and no kids at her age is not expected in pinas kasi.
ReplyDeleteHmmm, in pinas even your family will ask the same questions. Wala ka pang asawa, wala ka pang anak, ang tanda mo na, tumaba ka na, may puti na ang buhok mo, etc.
ReplyDeleteHmmm, that’s why I don’t intend on going back to pinas. Here, abroad, nobody cares about those things. They only care about who you are as an individual and what you can do.
ReplyDeleteI hear you. Even Filipinos here can be overbearing. No thanks.
Deletei agree. being a mom or a wife is never a measure of being a complete woman. dami kayang miserableng mom or wife. no thanks. 2021 na.
ReplyDeleteWag nyo kc pansinin. If you pay attention it means you are affected! If you confidently beautiful with a heart just ignore be silent and create your own paradise.
ReplyDeleteTHIS. I am one of those women na okay lang hindi makapagasawa at magkaanak. But that doesn't make me feel less of a woman. Alam mo naman sa sarili mo if marriage and motherhood is for you.
ReplyDeleteHirap ng buhay mag aasawa pa ba dapat? Dami gastos kaya at pandemya pa heller. I advised my daughters not to get married less hassle less stress less expenses sorry sa mga gusto mag asawa parang luxury na sakin ang marriage pasensya na po nkk trauma ang bills
ReplyDeleteTrue!
DeleteBeing Single is a trend nowadays - Seo Dan/CLOY
ReplyDeleteBakit pag binata 30+ elegible bachelor, pag dalaga 30+ old maid
ReplyDeleteIkr?
Delete9:30, because may biological clock ang babae for child bearing. Ang lalaki wala. They can make babies even in their 90s.
DeleteTo each his own. Unfortunately, Philippine society is very traditional, judgemental and yet, so hypocritical. You do you, Alex.
ReplyDeletePeople love to impose and project their values on other people. Instead of being sensitive and discerning on what not to say, they act rude and ipamukha pa sayo na kulang ang pagkatao mo pag wala kang asawa at anak.
ReplyDeleteI wholeheartedly agree na di kakulangan sa babae ang di pagkakaroon ng anak or asawa pero kasi napansin ko yung mga ganitong defend nang defend sa ideals kuno nila, sila din yung atat na atat magka-anak at mag-asawa.
ReplyDeleteparang di naman
DeleteI don't think so. Marriage and kids actually scare them dahil alam nilang hindi biro yun. These women are just free-spirited and don't conform easily to traditionalist society.
DeleteHindi naman. Minsan kasi mapupuno ka rin kapag paulit-ulit ng tanong. Lalo na kung wala ka namang naaagrabyado dahil single ka. Di rin naman nila papakainin pamilya mo kung sakaling mag-asawa at mag-anak ka. Pero kada kita sa'yo tatanungin ka kung kailan ka mag-aasawa. :)
DeleteHindi naman. Me and my husband 8 years married before mag decide mag anak kasi super inenjoy namin na kaming dalawa lang muna. And hindi kami atat mag anak
DeleteHindi kaya. 30+ na ko nag asawa. Inenjoy ko ng bonggang bongga ang 20s ko. And i will continue to defend those who choose a different path than mine. Hindi lahat atat. That's a fact.
DeleteIt's a struggle to have people tell you why you don't have kids yet. And you know, the pressure is real especially if you see women posting happy mother's day gifts on social media kaya I am not as active as I used to be na sa FB. But I would want my own child, because I grew up as a single child to a solo parent after my father died when I was 8. And then my mom died when I was 15 and the struggle of loneliness and being alone is real on this one. Kaya I am really trying na magkaanak kame ng asawa ko because I've suffered loneliness long enough and I want to grow old with my husband, children and apos. S
ReplyDeleteSending you virtual hug! Whoever you are may you be blessed with a child soon!
Deleteaw hugs for you. that tugged at the heartstrings
DeleteNagtry kami for 5 years ng husband ko.. pero wala tlga. Lagi akong umiiyak sa gabi, iniisip ko anong kulang sakin, bakit sa iba ang dali. Ngayon tanggap ko na at ng asawa ko na wala tlga, hndi ako blessed magkachild pero blessed naman ako sa ibang bagay. Pero sa culture natin unfortunately may mali at kulang syo kung hndi ka magkaka-anak.. at magasawa. Sana mabago na yan.
ReplyDeleteI feel for you. I count my blessings too. Kahit na walang anak, masaya kami ng asawa ko pero etong mga relatives namin ang laging nangungulit. Wala sa plan namin ang mag-anak sa totoo lang is there something wrong with that? Wala, our life- our decision. Periodt
DeleteFrankly speaking marriage is a trap. You will be trapped with responsibilities and expectations. If I had to describe marriage in two words: sacrifices and hard work. Life becomes a routine and it’s very expensive to build a family. Of course kids’ love is the best thing in the world. But kids and husband won’t give you the happiness you need. It should come from within you by not forgetting and neglecting who you are, who you want to be. Find your own source of happiness first and you will be a better wife and mom.
ReplyDeleteAgree! You need to have a strong sense of self and identity first instead of anchoring your worth on your husband and kids.
DeleteWow 4.29pm! Pak na pak! Sayo na ang ms.universe crown! At dahil sa sinabi mo, di ko muna ipush na magka love life kasi wala pa akong happiness from within hehe
Delete4:29 pm. Wow clap clap clap. Best answer!
Delete429 tama ka nman. Hehe, but for me, single or married without kids was not for me. Nakakadepress yan. Now, married with kids happy na ako. But sa totoo lang, parang sa kids lang nabawasan ang sadness ko sa buhay. I don't know what is wrong with me but lagi akong malungkot.
DeleteAgree! We need to talk about this kasi lagi nalang ginoglorify yung pagiging mommy and wife without much attention sa totoong trade off ng pagaasawa. It's really not for everyone sa truelang.
DeleteAaaww sis 9:13, i wish mahanap mo ang happiness mo :)
Deletemag aalaga na lang ako ng madaming pusa kesa mag asawa at magkaanak. ayaw kung may dumidikta sa akin.
Delete4:29, agreed. Kids are worth it..the marriage? Hmm. To each his own. It's not for everyone. And it's impossible to predict how it'll turn out too.
Delete💯 love reading comments like this 🙂 thank you🙂
DeleteOk lang sana kung ang mga pakialanera at tsimosa ang magaalaga sa anak mo. Sa hirap ng buhay now my time p kayo mang bwishit ng ibang tao. Unahin nyo muna ang pamilya nyo bago ang ibang tao noh!
ReplyDeleteMy goal talaga is to be that tita who will dissuade the young ones from getting married. End the cycle ganon! HAHAHA tbh i’m not at that tita age yet but i’m quite open to my nosy titas na i don’t wanna get married coz i don’t wanna be miserable hehehe
ReplyDeleteYou're not wrong there, haha! Be good to have a tita like that for a change.
DeleteKelan ka ikakasal?
ReplyDeletePag kinasal na: kelan kayo mag aanak? Bilisan nyo di na akyo bumabata.
Pag nagkaanak: oh kelan nyo susundan? Lumalaki na dapat sundan na.
Pag nasundan: o baka uulit ka pa, tama na yan. Kawawa naman asawa mo na nagttrabaho.
Bwiset. Mapa single o may asawa, aminin nyo, may mga tao lang talaga na pakialamera sa buhay natin. Kahit ano gawin mo, sinusukat ka lang talaga. Mga pakshet
Pag naghiwalay: o kelan kayo magbabalikan kawawa naman anak nyo?
DeletePag nagbalikan: o kelan mo iiwan asawa mong babaero?
LOL
Typical meddlesome folk. Terrible Filipino traits
Deleteapplause for alex! well said. clap clap clap and standing ovation too. :-)
ReplyDeleteYes! Allow people to choose their own path, hindi yung minemeasure mo kung asan sila sa buhay based on society's expectations. Kung saan sila masaya, respeto.
ReplyDeleteWe had a friend who struggled to conceive. It took 11 years after getting married to finally have a baby and we, her barkada, were there for her journey and struggles. Sobrang happy kami when she told us she's pregnant!
ReplyDeletePero nung naging mommy na siya, she looked at us differently. Parang she thinks she's above us all kasi she's now a mother and kami lahat are lower beings for being single and/or childless. Lahat ng topics niya tuwing hangout is all about motherhood and how she feels complete kasi she has a baby now... Somehow we started to drift apart kasi medyo masakit na sinasabi niya.
Hay. We're just sad that someone like her, who knew the struggle firsthand, became something like that in the end. A woman putting down other women.
1:12 that’s sad 😟 I hope my friends won’t end up like that
ReplyDelete